Jealousy.

Let's talk jealousy for a minute. We all have times in our life where we feel jealous of someone. Or of a situation.  But how we handle that jealousy is a big test of character.  If you knock someone down because you are jealous..well, then you kinda suck.  A lot.  I like to handle my jealousy as blatently as possible. A perfect example would be when I was on bed rest, my best friend was working out every day without me. Was I jealous? Hell yes. How did I handle it? I told her, "hey, you suck and I'm totally jealous! And also, I love you and you are kicking ass!  Can't wait to work out with you again!" Easy peasy! 

Another situation I'm kind of jealous of; my brother lives in the same town as my parents. Their kids will get to have a super close relationship with their grandparents and get to see them pretty much every day.  Of course they will be close to Mason too, but they won't get to see him every day or even every week. I'm also jealous of the free childcare. So yes, I'm totally jealous. BUT how I handle that is to be happy for all of them!!!! What an awesome thing for all of them to be so close and to get to spend that time together.  And I also focus on my situation. While we don't have consistent free childcare, I get to hang out with Mason more than if I could go back to working like I was before. Yeah, money is super tight this way but we make it work and I am thankful for my time with little man!  And my parents come visit Mason and vice versa when possible. 

I'm also jealous that I don't get to just "try for another kid" when we are ready.  We have to first pay off all our hospital bills then save up $4500 just for a chance!  I'm jealous of those people that get to have smooth pregnancies.  How I handle this? I think about how awful infertility is and how hard a scary pregnancy is and how could I ever be upset that someone doesn't have to go through that? I would not wish that on anyone!  And I focus on how utterly grateful I am to even have Mason!  Words can't express my gratitude!

It's easy to overcome your jealousy when you focus on the things you have going for you in your life.  Yeah, we all have things we wish could be different, but we also have some good things going too!  People need to stop focusing so much on other peoples lives!

What you don't do when you are jealous is put them down or make it seem like they don't deserve what they have.  Now I won't claim to be perfect all the time. Jealousy is not an easy emotion sometimes.  But I strive to be a good person every day. I try to encourage people and be happy for them when things are going well for them...even when they aren't going well for me.  I read something earlier today that said to pay attention to the people are happy for your happiness and sad for your sadness. And to embrace those people.  It's so very true!  While I was going through infertility and then got pregnant, I found out a lot about who those people are. It seems like a few got that backwards. Always seemed to thrive on my sadness then put me down when I was happy. Fucked up.

Now what I need to do is to not let those jealous assholes get to me so bad.  I won't lie. It really bothers me when people say mean things just because they are jealous.  I need to let it go and just take it as a compliment. I'm really working on that. I guess I'm just uber sensitive.  

Now that I got that off my chest, I need to work on my happy post!  Tomorrow is thanksgiving so I will be doing a thankful post!!! But now its sleepy time!  Good night!!